You know my heart and its ways
You who formed me before I was born
In the secret of darkness before I saw the sun
In my mother’s womb
Welcome to the world little Bear. One more sleep and I will hold you in my arms. Your Sitti
in the secret of darkness
before I saw the sun
in my mother’s womb
Â Â Â Â ~Psalm 139:14
Dear little Boe,
You are aÂ miracle. Â A gift. Â Someone new to love and long to hold. Â A bundle of sweet smells and warmÂ cuddles. Â You have us all in awe and wonder.
How beautiful you are.Â A blank slate. Â A crisp whiteÂ page to be filled with lovely lyrics. Â An empty vessel within which we place all our hopes and dreams. Â Your innocence is compelling. Â I feel absolution in your presence.
I know that some little parts of you have been etched from my own body. Â That in itself is mind blowing. Â I look at you and feel such love and connection- and at the same time, a sense of mystery. Â Who are you? Â Who will you become? Â How will I fit into your life? Â What will we do togetherÂ to build our relationship?
Little lovey, the day you were born we all experienced a life changing transition. Â Woman and man became mother and father. Â Mother and father became grandmother and grandfather. Â It may take some time for us to learn ourÂ new roles so please be patient with us.
I hear other grandparents brag that they can spoil their grandchildren and then send them home. Â All the fun and none of the responsibility. Â Then they laugh! Â But Boe, I have a little secret for you.
I would do it all again. Â The pain of labor, the sleepless nights, the diapers, the desitine, the sticky kisses, the million and one soccer, basketball and little leagueÂ games, the waiting up for teenagers, the “sex” talks, and the endless and painful letting gos- witnessing three little boys traverse their paths into manhood.
ButÂ there would be do-overs. Â I would clean less, order more take out, play more games and be more attentive to the ebb and flow of raising a family. Â And most of all I would allow myself to enjoy it all. Â Not be so stressed and insecure. Not be so hard on myself. Â Not compare myself to other moms who appeared to be doing it better.
Little Boe, when your daddy was growing up, I wrote him letters on his birthdays and other occasions so that he would know how my love for him unfolded and developed as he grew up and became a young man. Â When he graduated from high school I gave him all those letters. Â It was a labor of love.
I wantÂ to do that for you, little Boe. Â I want you to see what I see in you. Â And in those moments when you are feeling insecure or a little blue, I want you to know how much you are loved, fearfully and wonderfully made, and carefully knit together in the secret of your mother’s womb by an even greater Love.
My heart is full. Â My life has taken on a new meaning with your birth. Â I have so many things I’d like to share with you. Â So many songs I want to sing to you. Â And I have all the time in the world to listen to you.
Stay sweet, little boy. Â Take in all the love you can. Â Learn honesty and integrity. Â Be generous and kind.
Grow up to be a man for others.
I love you,
Hail Mary, full of grace
At a Lenten overnight retreat with 65 adolescent girls.
The Lord is with thee
Yoga pants, push up bras, still trying to make sense of their bodies and their souls, clear skinned and broken complexioned, immature and seeking- all seen and heard and embraced by a higher power.
Blessed are you among women
You are precious and perfect in God’s eyes, a temple of the Holy Spirit, hope for the world.Â Don’t ever underestimate what lies yet dormant within you.Â You are destined for goodness and prosperity.
And blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus
Co-creators with God, the capacity to bring forth life both literally and figuratively.Â Nurturer, dreamer, lover, sanctuary.Â You have so much to give.Â I wish you could see what I see when I look at you.
Holy Mary, mother of God
Look within yourself for inspiration and strength.Â Look outside yourself and see your journey unfold.Â Reach out and make a holy connection with all of human kind.Â Â You are never alone in this world.
Pray for us sinners
Let Mary be your spiritual mother.Â Let her life and her sacrifice inform your every decision.Â You are loved and forgiven.Â Again and again and again.
Now and at the hour of our death
Live like there is no tomorrow.Â Take joy in this day.Â Be the woman you are destined to be.Â Start now.Â Don’t dilly dally.Â Your life is precious and you are already on the path.Â Be kind.Â Be in solidarity with the poor and the poor in spirit.Â Be the womb that gives forth life.
Be a woman of God.